RichBurns Coaching
I would encourage anyone who is going through a major change in their life—job change, relationships, moving, retirement and so forth—to seek out a coach. That move is proven to pay long term return on investment while reducing stress and increasing happiness.
Working with a group of military active duty soon-to-be civilians a while back, reminded me of my own transition from active duty to civilian. I was serving as a volunteer with Boots to Business, an entrepreneurial education and training program offered by the U.S. Small Business Administration (SBA) as part of the Department of Defense Transition Assistance Program (TAP). It provides active duty military preparation for leaving the service.
But transitioning to civilian life and career, can be a real shock, just like many other major life changes. In the Navy we have our own jargon, a common mission, and a culture of service to nation. We even have a common dress/appearance with the uniform. Further, as a Navy Pilot, I had been part of a sub-culture with quite a bit of “swagger” built in.
That all changed the day I took my uniform off for the last time. Looking back, I always knew that someday I would return to civilian life, but nothing can prepare you for the actual event. I had a tremendous sense of loss because of the high degree of camaraderie I enjoyed in the Navy. My last assignment had been as a base commander, with a jam-packed daily schedule and the phone ringing off the hook. Then the schedule was empty and the calls stopped.
What’s next? Who are my friends and associates? What is my identity? How will I earn a living? I later figured out I was literally going through a change very similar to the five stages of grief, and it affected my family as well.
Looking back, I wish I had access to professional coaching at that time. Coaches provide their clients with the tools to succeed by staying focused on the important things, while keeping grounded in their self-confidence and self-worth. This is critical in making a “smooth landing” after a major change. Often, we go off in a multitude of directions—as did I—wasting time, effort and even money, all the while increasing our sense of frustration.
